I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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