Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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