For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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