Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
