3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
