I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
