I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
