My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just cut my nipple shaving
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
