That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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