pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
So squirting runs in the family.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
i need some magic done to my vagina
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
