Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
