another moral hangover. fuck.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
