Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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