Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize