Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Boobs are out for the taking
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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