god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
