i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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