I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
