Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
