There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
