just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
