ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
