She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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