I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
He kissed a someone with a penis
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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