You're completely useless in the revolution.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
