bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize