Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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