Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
