How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize