She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
