Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
then he tried to convert me to islam
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
