oh god the rape fog is back!
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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