she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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