i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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