Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
