Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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