her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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