Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
