she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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