Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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