Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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