how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
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