May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
