I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
