the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize