just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
