are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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