I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
