She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
