Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
